Sunday, 18 June 2006

Roving at last!

Monday 18 June 2007

My best friend often has very good ideas.

Recently he had one which has set me free from my bathroom.

As I told you, I have to attend to my personal hygiene 3 to 4 times a day. And rinse thoroughly each time.

In time I ended up getting used to it. From being “bloody annoying” the ritual has become “a bit of a nuisance”.

Even since I went back to work, I haven’t strayed from Dr Foldès’ instructions and I am continuing to take four semi-showers a day.

In fact I could content myself with three sessions a day (one in the morning, one when returning home from work and one in the evening when going to bed). After all, he told me “3 to 4 times a day” at my last consultation. But quite obviously the “good pupil” side of my nature, forces me to have 4. In "3 to 4 times a day", I hear only 4 times but still, if it’s only three, that’s nevertheless fine.

As a result, when I went back to work, I was returning home every mid-day to take care of myself.

Which was getting me into a bit of a jam. It was impossible to do what I had to during a lunch hour and the return journey was taking me an hour and a half (including lunch).

The other day, I had lunch with my best friend and it appeared to him that the constraint came in reality from the fact that I have to rinse thoroughly. You can’t rinse your intimate areas thoroughly in the toilets (unless they are equipped with these new luxury thrones from Japan with optional heated seats and a fountain for rinsing, as I have seen in the past, but those aren’t the sort of toilets at my workplace).

So my best friend suggested that I should carry a wash bottle (you know, those laboratory bottles with a sort of bent spout which chemists use?).

With that I would have the ability to rinse thoroughly and with complete discretion in any toilets.

That evening in the supermarket, the idea became more refined: as it was a question of needing a sort of portable fountain, I could also use a bottle of water with a “sports special” cap (the ones you take off with your teeth while running, and which allow you to squirt the water out in a jet by pressing the sides).

I tried several. Some bottles were too hard (as a result when you press them you don’t get a fountain, you had to tilt the bottle to get a substitute jet, well short of my expectations). Others were too supple, I could press harder and produce a magnificent jet while holding the bottle upright (head up) but their capacity was too small for my taste (25 cl).

As far as I am concerned, the ideal would be to have a litre of water available.

While waiting to try out my friend’s wash bottle, I chose a bottle containing 50 cl and I diluted the iodine well, which means there is less to rinse.

As a result, I walk around now with my little pink bag containing a bottle of iodine, a beaker (for mixing the iodine and water,) some sterile swabs, my bottle with the “sports” cap, some soft paper handkerchiefs and one or two soft sanitary towels.

I am finally free to do what I want during my lunch hours.

The treatments, which I have to continue until 4 July at least, are far less of a constraint now that I can do them anywhere.

That is bliss!

[Original in French]

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  1. Hi Papillon!
    Isn't it nice whenever you gain a little bit of liberty?

    I'm first!

  2. Elté reblogged25 June 2007 at 16:18

    A fountain for your personal toilet in your handbag ... that's the ultimate chic for bodily cleanliness. Very practical, I'm going to pinch the copyright for my next grubby travels :-)

  3. He he he!
    A very good idea. It's funny, as I was reading the beginning of your message, I thought of suggesting that as a solution.
    So much the better that you are now more free. These are the little things that can change your life! If you have other worries or need other ideas, let us know, let me know. I am a bag of ideas for funny situations!

  4. Hello Lilou! Clearly being liberated from a constraint is very peasant. I admit also that I love to be the first to comment. That may seem nothing but it always pleases me :)

    Pinch away Elté reblogged, pinch. I found it a brilliant idea and actually, when you find yourself stuck somewhere on the prairies without a nearby shower, being well equipped is world class.

    A bag of ideas Nono? I love that expression. And I warn you that it hasn't fallen on deaf ears.

  5. See, this type of pragmatic-case post is incredibly good!

  6. Hi, I believe I have the honour of being the best friend ... indeed it was I who had the idea of using the wash-bottle.

    I am launching into a comment as I have been reading Papillon's blog since the beginning without daring to insert myself. On one hand the subject is so serious and it intimidates me and what's more, it needs to be said, "there are no blokes among the commenters". I feel alone.

    But now that I'm being spoken about openly and there is a more playful mote, I am letting myself go.

    Thank you for your compliments, young ladies, I am very flattered. (only Nono who upset me by saying she had the idea too! I'll give you a duel whenever you like of eccentric ideas for strange situations :-)!)

    But in fact it wasn't hard to have this idea because Papillon's freedom and her smile have no price as far as I am concerned. She has cheerfulness that communicates and a contagious sadness and I always prefer cheerfulness. I am so sad about what happened to her when she was so small, and proud of what she has dared to do, that helping in such a small way makes me very happy.

    Well done for your real writing talent Papillon, keep going, strong, fragile, courageous and even a bit scared... we love you like that.

  7. Hi papillon

    I've just discovered your blog and it's a heck of a discovery for me!
    Even though I don't know you, I feel I am sharing something great with you (I think it not the same for all girls who have suffered the same atrocities, because that's the word!!) and I admire your courage in saying it because for me it's the first time I have spoken about it even though I'm 32. I don't remember my circumcision but during my adolescence I heard my grandmother talking about it and I understood. At first it wasn't too bad, I didn't have a sexual life, but afterwards it became complicated. The worst is that you can't even talk about it because you feel guilty about an act that you haven't committed and that you carry around like a cross. I married without even speaking about it to my husband (I think he tacitly agreed not to speak about it) and after my separation I was afraid to meet men and have to explain. At the moment I have someone who is beginning to be important to me but I haven't the courage to tell him. I don't know how to tackle the subject. Once he asked my why my clitoris was so small, that froze me. Of course I could have profited from the situation to tell him but it wasn't that simple.

    I bear such a grudge against my parents for having made me suffer such a monstrosity in the name of I don't know what tradition.

    Papillon, I thank you so much for having given me the courage to speak about it, I hope it's only the start.

    Thinking about the story of the young 15 year old girl and I say to myself her case was worse but she also has a great deal of credit for speaking about it to her love. I am more than twice her age but I am not sure of being as courageous as she is.

    Your advice will be welcome.
    Speak later I hope.

  8. Hello Papillon
    I am wholeheartedly with you!
    An idea came to me while reading your story and I hope it's not out of place. You see, it seems to me that you have had therapy. Probably this wasn't free. I think it would be normal for your mother to take over the cost of this therapy and even that she pays you damages and interest (pretium doloris) for what she knowingly did. She was an adult at the time that she had you circumcised. It was her unique and entire responsibility.

    I think it's possible to start civil proceedings for example in the case of incest but with the reservation that there is a time limit. This limit is I think ten years after the occurrence of the incident. Perhaps for civil cases the limit will be ten years after start of therapy. If your mother is convicted but doesn't have the means to pay, I believe there are funds available for compensation of victims.

  9. Hi Anita, it's good sometimes to have some lightheartedness :) If in addition, it's practical, well, that's luxury!

    Yoohoo Champignon! My saviour commenting! I've already told you in person but I'll tale the opportunity to say it again here: thank you for your enlightening idea. And also thank you for being here, reading me and for complimenting me so (there it is, the famous chirping :) I don't joke here all the time (the subject doesn't really lend itself well) but when the occasion presents itself, you have to take advantage of it. Come back whenever you like, the door is wide open! And it's true that a masculine opinion will not be superfluous either.

    Hello and welcome Lola! You know, I started this blog to help me think about things. Someone said "The best way to think is to write" (wasn't it on your blog I read that, Mlle Crapaud?). Any way, the courage to throw yourself into the water, it's true that you have to. But throwing yourself into the water doesn't mean just writing posts, it's also leaving comments on a blog and revealing things, as you did here. My sister is 33 and still refuses to talk about it (that's finally changing a little, but barely). Age is nothing Lola. What counts is talking about it. To tame the horror and go through the pain and anger. Anyway, don't be angry about the difficulties that you have found when broaching the subject. Myself I had six years of therapy before speaking about it. I hope this is only a start for you and that you will find it easier and easier to express yourself on the subject.
    Concerning the young girl of 15, she was extremely courageous and admirable, that's true. But at the same time she was up against it (she was infibulated) and couldn't really do anything else other than tell her lover what had happened, or split up.
    Myself I find it very courageous not to keep silent even when you could (apparently there are men who aren't aware of anything) Yes Lola, I think you are already courageous just to keep going in spite of this abomination.
    I'll leave you my email address: papillonblog {at} gmail {dot} com

    Hello Mumu! No your idea isn't out of place. My man also asked me once if I would take legal action against my mother. And my response was ... I can't. I still don't know why even though it's not out of fear. No doubt because in one way I still don't know if she participated in the decision to have me circumcised (I waver: one day I say yes, the next day i say no) and in another way I think that it's too difficult. What I want are spontaneous apologies, certainly not that she goes to prison or that they are taken to a tribunal... And then of course there is the thing about not washing your linen in public. My current position is debatable, I acknowledge that. I don't want to discourage young women and girls who want to get compensation through the courts. But for myself, I admit I can't. As for my therapy sessions, it's important that I pay them myself (that's part of my therapeutic contract) but even if she could contribute, I believe she would refuse. That would be as if she were with me in my reconstruction, as if she were by my side. And at the moment, I refuse to grant her that. In addition I really doubt she would suggest that herself. She has know for years that I have therapy and she has never wanted to speak about it.

  10. That's a good idea! And one which seems to me need not be reserved to those who have just had an operation! I've always envied men, for whom it's just child's play to wash their intimate areas because they are external!! For us it's more complicated ... as you have discovered!
    Well done to your best friend, and to you who knew how to develop the idea.

  11. It's these little things that make a world of difference, isn't it? I am happy for you :-)

  12. Hello and thanks, Claude and Anna! After all this, I'm going to keep the idea and re-use it whenever I go trekking in the wilds with no water on tap :)

  13. I burst out laughing when I read this post! It's really a good idea! Mad that nobody thought of it before!
    I'd really like to witness the duel between nono and champignon :-))

  14. Lalita, I'll let you know the date of the duel when it is fixed :)


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