Monday, 9 March 2009
A life makeover
A few days ago, Relax Max asked, in his own inimitable way, "if anybody out there was awarded a "do over", at what point in your life would you start it?" I say inimitable because the question came in the comments after a somewhat mysterious post. I still don't understand it.
I never did answer the question because I kept changing my mind.
At first I thought I might go back to the moment of conception and delay it for a good few years. That way would lie three advantages: I wouldn't have to be the sensible older sister, I could have a complete makeover, and best of all, I'd be a lot younger. But no, that would make me a completely different person.
After that things went well enough I suppose, until it came to the first big exam stage, O-Levels at 16. How I wish I could go back to that age and be less uptight about the whole thing. It seemed so much like a matter of life or death in those days, that my whole life depended on it. I had no idea how insignificant it would seem a few years later.
Then I got to university in Liverpool. Would I have changed that? No, Liverpool was a wonderful place to be a student in the 60s, even if I didn't take full advantage of all that was going on. It was an exciting time, when students all around the world were protesting about one thing or another. French students were causing mayhem in Paris, and in Liverpool we were sitting-in. I can't remember why. And of course, Beatle mania was still pretty well in full flow. I wouldn't want to change all that, but I could have loosened up and been less serious, taken more advantage of what was happening - we had plenty of "happenings" too. If I'd been different, I might have met different people, done different and more exciting things.
Later on, when we started the constant house moving, I might have preferred to have cut one or two places out, but then I wouldn't have had those experiences. Life's rich pattern would have lost some of its depth.
So when might I start my makeover? I can't think of any one time when I'd really want to change everything that has come since. Apart from little local difficulties such as not having a job, I really wouldn't want not to be where I am at the moment. You are the sum of your parts after all, and without the specific experiences I've had I wouldn't be the person I am. I have a wonderful family and some very special friends, many of whom I've met on line. I really am content where I am at the moment, though I grant you that at times people close to me may be surprised at that statement.
So, totally hijacking Max's post, I'd be interested in hearing where any of you would start a makeover, or if you don't want one, where would you at least think about it?
Posted by A. at 21:08